If ever there was a film deserving of the infamy of living thing included in a bad movie night, it is frosty as Ice. This portrait of the in the future nineties was Vanilla Ices first and unaided starring role, and its nearly as good as you would expect. The nonsensical tagline to the film, "How do you melt a heart of stone? Just mount up Ice" beautiful much says it all. Of course, it arrived 2 minutes after Vanillas 15 minutes were over, fittingly it has languished upon video for years, and is now developing into something of a cult hit for those who can appreciate how hilarious awesomely bad movies can be.
One engaging note of trivia: This is the first film for cinematographer Janus Kaminski, whose forward-thinking credits enhance no less than Schindlers List. Wow. I guess we in reality get every have to begin somewhere. upon the additional hand, this film effectively killed the career of director David Kellog, who waited 10 years for the laughter to die next to in the past directing the probably equally awful Inspector Gadget. Whoops.
Vanilla plays Johnny, leader of a super tough posse of biker rappers, who apparently go from town to town drama in warehouses where the lights hang at approximately knee level. This particular gang is as a result tough, that they dont even dependence helmets. Though, arrive to think of it, enormous head trauma might actually tell a lot.
On the showing off to their neighboring gig, or wherever it is theyre actually going, the gang encounters the horseback riding heart of stone that Vanilla desires to melt gone his, um, Ice. Of course it belongs to an disconcerted overachiever named Kathy, who helpfully needs a little Vanilla in her liveliness to spice things up. (I made that one in the works myself). Ice starts by nearly killing her afterward her own horse, which is practically the most extreme pickup technique Ive ever seen, and strangely enough, seems to work. Sure, she acts every provoked and storms off, but as Vanilla notes:"Yup. Yup. She likes me". Its probably because shes ill of her possessive, walking clich of a boyfriend Rick.
One of the gang has some mechanical failure on the pretentiousness into town, thus the posse ends going on stuck at a hippy-trippy bike repair shop, manage by some insane antiquated couple. Thankfully, they rule the shop out of their house, which is oh correspondingly helpfully down the street from the perpetually smoky dwelling of Kathy and her parents.
Oh, and did I quotation that her parents are in the witness guidance program, and upon the control from two thugs who apparently have nothing greater than before to realize than sit concerning and wait for Kathys dad to appear on TV so they can track him down and extort child support from him? It seems papa Kathy played by Michael terrifying in what was undoubtedly not a draw attention to of his career was a cop who saying too much and ratted out some of his colleagues, who vowed revenge. Its in point of fact no incredulity this boy left the force; he is without a doubt the worst cop in the records of deed enforcement. His every instinct is unconditionally wrong. He doesnt acquire all right, or figure all out throughout the entire film. I guess thats what he gets for exasperating to suppress his daughters want to Iceify her stony heart.
But at least Vanilla is chilly right? His wardrobe alone is in point of fact something to behold, (I shock where he keeps every those clothes on his bike?) along considering his strangely erect hair, and I think any film that includes a dead-serious Vanilla Ice spewing such lines as "Yo Kat. Some words of wisdom: drop that zero and acquire as soon as the hero" at least deserves a look. And I havent even mentioned the scene where Vanilla deserted kicks the crap out of no less than five armed jocks who create the foolish mistake of messing in the manner of his homeboys bike. He is equally delicate in his melting of Kathys heart, which basically consists of him walking roughly speaking in imitation of no shirt on, talking approximately how "if youre vibrant sparkle for someone else, you aint living", and generally acting creepy and/or criminal. This is in fact just the tip of the iceberg. There are fittingly many more priceless moments of unintentional hilarity to discover.
So why is this movie the height of bad-movie night cinema? It is because it is hence definite that Vanilla and those operational in creating this film took it very, completely seriously. This by yourself accentuates other the laughable dialog, the ridiculous scheme and the clichd characters. anyhow the thought that someone actually thought this pile was going to be fine makes it every the more fortuitously hilarious.
Finding this film on VHS upon Ebay is roughly the solitary way youre going to be practiced to buy it, even if you can often still find it for rent at your local independent video store. Watch it afterward a help of friends even though absorbing your alcoholic drink of choice.
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